Sunday, May 9, 2010

happy mother's day

Today we honor our mothers.  Some of us will travel to a couple homes to visit their moms and grandmoms and if you're lucky, your great-grandmom.  Some will visit their moms at a nursing home and some at a cemetary. Regardless where your travels take you, this is the day set aside to let a most important woman in your life know how special they are.  Sometimes we take for granted how integral our mothers are, or have been, in the way we make decisions, look, and basically, how we live our lives. Oftentimes when we cannot figure out what to do, it is always the mother who is the one we ask for guidance and most often, consolation.  Mothers are the tapestry of all families.  Mothers are the heart and soul.
Scientific studies have determined that when babies are born, it is the nurturing touch that determines a healthy, stable and loving child.  Mothers naturally assume this huge responsibility without a second thought.  Our babies become the most important passion in our lives.  The bonding experience has no equal on earth, whether it be human or animals.  It begins in the womb and continues until we depart this life.  The attachments can run deep and if we are smart, we continue the journey for generations, leaving a little bit of ourselves for the next.  No one is perfect and we all make mistakes, but if we have a foundation of pure and unadulterated love and compassion, our choices will never be wrong. 
For many years I was one of the lucky gals that got to enjoy two great-grandmoms, three grandmoms, a grandmom-in-law, a mom-in-law and my own mom.  I never took their love for granted and made time to be with them whenever possible.  I felt their unconditional love and basked in their stories which gave me the strength and courage to live my own life as a mother to my three sons.  Now I am the matriarch of my family.  A couple of years ago, my mom and my mom-in-law left our world to be in a better place, within a few months of each other, so today I will just enjoy my time with Wayne, Mike, Dan and Steve.  Ah, but wait...boys will bring the girls home.  Someday, perhaps in the very near future, I will become a mom-in-law, and cherish the times I can share with the daughters I never had in the past.  I so love being a mom to three boys and never felt not having a daughter made a difference, but I will embrace the gift of having them in my life. The very last conversation I shared with my own mom a few years ago was about how hard we both had it from the mothers of our husbands and how we sustained those hardships because of our love for their sons.  We conversed about how I will be like my mom, who was the best mother-in-law, for neither of us want anyone else to feel the pain that we did.  Sometimes dominant women can be hurtful, perhaps not even intentionally, but this was an experience we had in common.  She was pleased that I had this insight.  It was one of many profound bonding times I cherished with my mom, and sadly, it was my last, for the next week she was gone.  We had our differences at times, as all mothers and daughters do, but we always found a way to resolve our issues.  That is the secret. I remember how tightly we hugged whenever we met, as if we could not let go.  So often I still feel her energies and I know she knows all the truths now that I shielded from her and our bond is even deeper in her passing.  That's how strong a mother's love is, even after death.  My mother-in-law and I evenually became buddies and this was a beautiful gift to both of us.  I always gave her my best and she finally accepted me.
Today I offer my extreme gratitude to all the mother figures in my life.  They have all been instrumental in molding me into the woman I am today.  I am proud to be a part of them and pray I make them proud and be the best mom I can.  When the time is right, I look forward to being a grandmom myself.  Until then, I will let my boys honor me by giving me their hugs.  That is all I ever want, and will ever need.  God bless all moms today.  Hugs and kisses to you all.  And a special hug to my sweet Aunt Diane.  xo